Juanita

Lyrics

Well I'm finally gettin' used to the water  
The way the tarantulas bite  
Those federals didn't believe  
I only came here to watch the bulls fight  
  
Tell my mother, "I need a good lawyer"  
Tell my father, "I'm getting a tan"  
My sleepy siesta down south of the border  
Is taking more time than I planned  
  
Oh Juanita somebody betrayed me  
They've given me ten years to life  
Juanita I need you to save me  
I promise I'll make you my wife  
  
I got a big house in Milwaukee  
With a color TV and a pool  
A Naugahyde bar and a Cadillac car  
Juanita they're waiting for you  
  
Tie the burro up down in the courtyard  
To keep the guard busy tonight  
When you bring my dinner make sure the tortilla  
Is filled with a gun or a knife  
  
Hey Juanita somebody betrayed me  
They've given me ten years to life  
Juanita I need you to save me  
I promise I'll make you my wife  
  
Juanita you'll love Wisconsin  
Wisconsin is gonna love you  
Yes, all of Milwaukee speaks Spanish  
Of course you're gonna wear American shoes  
  
Lake Michigan tastes like tequila  
Frijoles why they grow there on trees  
You can say adios to the pigs and the goats  
If you'll just do this one thing for me  
  
But Juanita somebody betrayed me  
They've given me ten years to life  
Juanita I need you to save me  
I promise I'll make you my wife  
  
Juanita, I, I swear it was all a mistake  
You see I was drowning out there in the ocean  
And I saw this bale coming by man  
So I grabbed it and I climbed up on top of it  
And I found this stick and I rowed myself into shore  
  
And when I got there  
The border patrol was waiting for me  
At the I didn't know what it was  
I promise you if you'll just marry me  
So I can become a citizen of Mexico  
  
I'll take you to Milwaukee  
You can meet all my friends  
They got these big shiny motorcycles  
And you can ride on the back of 'em with 'em  
  
Really, Juanita would I lie to you?