Pretty Fly For A Rabbi

Lyrics

(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
And all the goyim say I'm pretty fly for a rabbi  
  
Meccha leccha hi, meccha hiney hiney ho  
  
Our temple's had a fair share of rabbis in the past  
But most of'em were nudniks and none of'em would last  
But our new guy's real kosher, I think he'll do the trick  
I tell ya, he's to die for - he really knows his shtick  
  
So how's by you? Have you seen this Jew?  
Reads the Torah, does his own accounting too  
Working' like a dog at the synagogue  
He's there all day, he's there all day  
  
Just say "Vay is mir!" and he'll kick into gear  
He'll bring you lots of cheer and maybe bagels with some shmeer  
Just grab your yarmulka and  
Hey! Hey! Do that Hebrew thing!  
  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
And all the goyim say I'm pretty fly (for a rabbi)  
  
He shops at discount stores, not just any will suffice  
He has to find a bargain 'cause he won't pay retail price  
He never acts meshugga and he's hardly a schlemiel  
But if you want to haggle, oy, he'll make you such a deal!  
  
People used to scoff, now they say "Mazel tov!"  
He's such a macher 'cause he works his tuchis off  
Yeah, he keeps his cool and teaches shul  
What's not to like? What's not to like?  
  
Oh high holy days, you know he prays and prays  
And he never eats pastrami on white bread with mayonnaise  
Put on your yarmulka and  
Hey! Hey! Do that Hebrew thing!  
  
When he's doing a Bar Mitzvah, now that you shouldn't miss  
He'll always shlep on down for a wedding or a briss  
They say he's got a lot of chutzpah, he's really quite hhhhhip  
The parents pay the moyl and he gets to keep the tip!  
  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!  
  
Meccha leccha hi, meccha meccha cholly ho  
  
He's doin' well, I gotta kvell  
The yentas love him, even shicksas think he's swell  
Show up at his home, he says, "Shalom!"  
And "Have some cake-You want some cake?"  
  
Yeah he calls the shots, we really love him lots  
Oy gevalt, I'm so ferklempt that I could plotz!  
So grab your yarmulka--  
The one you got for Chanukah--  
  
Let's put on our yarmulkas and--  
Hey! Hey! Do that Hebrew thing!